Gnomeo and Juliet

Travelocity's gonna sue somebody

In what might become an anthem for the Gnome Liberation Front, Gnomeo and Juliet (very loosely) retells the story of William Shakespeare's famed tragedy of nearly the same name. But, after all, a movie about doomed garden gnome love by any other name is still as dreadful. Oddly enough, a pastiche of Shakespeare puns and gardening jokes took nine writers to fully realize. That might be the funniest thing about the film - Andy Riley, Kevin Cecil, Mark Burton, Emily Cook, Kathy Greenberg, Steve Hamilton Shaw, Kelly Asbury, Rob Sprackling, and John R. Smith. Between them, be it final touch-ups or penning the original stories and script drafts or tossing in jokes here and there, they pulled off true movie magic - a film that feels like it has no screenplay at all, written by a small committee. 

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In Theaters This Weekend

"Get some"

In theaters this weekend, we have another oddball mix. We're getting to that point of the year where, on the weekends, seemingly something for everyone will be released. For the action lovers, Fast Five comes out; for kids, there's the sequel to Hoodwinked; for older kids, Disney is releasing a film about prom called... Prom; and for the rest of us, there's Dylan Dog: Dead of Night. Which is more worth it? Which will be the safest way to spend your money?

Well, my answer is to see all of them. Even the ones that look terrible. But, that's my advice for anything in general. If you don't know what's bad, how can you really know what's good?

Let's take a closer look at each. 

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Why I Love Film - #7 (nsfw)

Sid and Nancy they ain't

There's a special brand (!) of genius behind Russell Brand and Rose Byrne's creations of rockstars Aldous Snow and Jackie Q. We were introduced to Aldous, a once famously sober rockstar, in Forgetting Sarah Marshall (when he used to have sex with Sarah Marshall) and were introduced to Jackie Q in Get Him to the Greek. The foul hilarity that spews forth from their mouths around each other kind of belie the talents they have as actors, but only on the surface. Once you can get past what they're saying, and you can pay attention to how they're saying it, the characters are two of the smartest things to come to film in the last few years. And definite career makers of performances. 

And something like this could only be captured on the big screen. The performances, and characters, are too big for anywhere else. 

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The Green Hornet

"That's right. I'll be playing a superhero. Don't look so confused."

It takes a certain kind of film to make me question the state of a genre. Certain horror movies make question the audiences that attend them, and certain movies that go on to win Oscars make me question the voters. But, not since 1990's Captain America (a horrid movie starring Matt Salinger as the first Avenger) have I sat down and thought about the state of a genre. I remember seeing that and being thankful that even after such a gigantic misfire we're still allowed Batman movies and Spiderman movies and even another Captain America film (which appears to be infinitely better). The Green Hornet, you should know, is one of those certain films - I've seen it twice now and both times I've thought to myself "is this the state of the superhero film? This is what we've come to?" 

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3 Idiots, Jolene, and Others on DVD This Week

3 Idiots Knuckle Up

This is an odd week for DVD releases... usually, lately, we've had three or four recognizable films that have either won awards, or critical praise, or have been revered in their own way for being terrible so we can lament the fact that they're now available in yet another format. This week, of course to break the trend we're so used to, are three releases I can safely say I've never heard of. But, in all fairness, I'm looking forward to them. Some what. A Bollywood-ish farce called 3 Idiots, a walk across the country with an orphaned girl Jolene, and a walk from one end of the room to the other in Bunny and the Bull. 

Which is more worth your time and money, however? Probably all of them. But, I'm guessing that Bunny and the Bull might be the best bet. 

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In the Name of Jesus

Give him his fucking eggs back!

Every Easter, much like every other holiday, there are certain movies that just complete the proceedings. Scary movies complete Halloween, and there are countless Christmas movies to watch every year, but what about days like today? Well, I've compiled a list of the five best people to play Jesus - from Jim Caviezel to Ted Neeley. Let's do it. 

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The Lincoln Lawyer

"Is anyone else following this ending? I mean..."

Consider it a John Grisham novel on steroids. Matthew McConaughey is adept at playing lawyers with an evident moral compass that they just choose to ignore. I remember the first time I saw A Time to Kill on television, and I was mostly just interested in seeing Sandra Bullock in something that wasn't a frothy romantic comedy. But, I left the film impressed mostly by McConaughey and his bittersweet performance. Fifteen years later, I'm reminded of why I like him as an actor in the first place. It's not easy to get behind him when he comes out with films like Surfer, Dude or Fool's Gold or Failure to Launch, but in films like Contact or Tropic Thunder, or The Lincoln Lawyer, his considerable skill is put to unreasonable use. He is an actor, first and foremost. Especially when he keeps his shirt on. 

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